In the privacy of my own bedroom – or anywhere else (in general) – I have done many things that have never came to surface until now. I never told my mom, my cousin and my grandmother or my dad, my best offline friend/long distance friend Alice and my online friends. Please don’t judge me, although I highly doubt that you will. 🙂
These are things I did to escape reality, even if only for a few seconds. These things helped me a lot. It’s not all of them, though.
From seventh to eighth grade, I had an obsession with Manga. I know absolutely nothing about it now, but I secretly wish that I could go back to starting at the back of a book and reading to the front – I want to do what I thought was “reading backwards” and “so strange”. I miss Bing lending me her Manga books – there was this one series I loved. It was romantic and cute and all things cliche. Bing moved half way through our eighth grade year, and offered to give me the complete set of the series I had fallen in love with. I think it was four or five books, or maybe more. I’m not sure. I just remember reading the series over and over and over and over again. I declined her offer. Then she said that I must, and that’s when I replied with, “I don’t think my mom and Lard would let me keep them.” At that time, my mom would always look through my things. Privacy didn’t exist in my life back then. I wish I knew what the series was so I could start buying the books and have my own set. I miss Bing, too. Not because of the books, but because she helped me find an escape through something different – something that wasn’t very big at that school – and she was generous and kind, always.
Reading used to be my escape, too. When Bing moved, I “checked books out” of my journalism (which included Newspaper and Yearbook) teacher’s bookshelf. At my rate I was finishing books in half a day to a full day, and Mrs. Reimer (I think was her name?) ended up telling me that I didn’t have to check out the books that I took, and that I could take one to three books if I wanted. She had about 48 books, and I finished reading them all in five weeks. That’s when she started checking out books for me to read from the library – when you move so much, you sometimes skip lessons or have to re-learn them, because schools have different curriculums (even if in the same state). I still don’t know that decimal system thing for libraries, or anything like that. That’s bad, or isn’t it?
Anyway, what Mrs. R did for me was extremely helpful, and all I had to do was drop the library books into the Drop Box. Teachers back then were very helpful. Or maybe it was merely the teachers and staff at Forney that weren’t the most helpful? 🙁 I don’t think they understood. No matter how many times you write that you need help, not all teachers are helpful to their students off the subject.