Catchy title, huh? Probably made you wanna click it to read more? Yeah, okay. Way to go, me.
For those of you just tuning in, I am vulnerable and have been for quite some time now. Actually, I think it began ever since the birth control. I’ve been suffering from depression. Not diagnosed, but I might as well be diagnosed with it. Seriously. I mean, anything – no matter its mass – is bringing me down.
I’m so sick of Isaac treating me the way he does. And if my mom asks about it, I can start talking and telling her what happened, and he just interrupts me: “No, no, no, stop it. Oh, my gosh. She’s just complaining about nothing.” Then she walks away.
It’s like she doesn’t care to hear my side. But she needs to, because it’s breaking me.
I went into the dining room a while ago and set up my laptop at the table, then sat down.
“Here are the rules: You don’t talk to me, you don’t look at me, you don’t make any noises, you don’t bother me and you definitely don’t tell on me or else you’ll regret it. No one wants you here, anyway, so shut up and just sit there and do us all a favor and don’t do anything.”
Isaac said that.
I’m twenty years old, and he lacks respect for me. I haven’t done anything to him for him to get to treat me like this!
He had the TV on some haunting show…
It said “green planet” next to a red dot in the right hand corner of the screen, so I laughed out loud and said, “Oh, my gosh. ‘Green planet?’ It’s a red dot.”
“Shut up. Remember what I said?” Isaac warned.
Me: Don’t talk to me like that. Leave me alone.
Isaac: (laughs) I don’t have to. No one will believe you.
Me: Leave me alone.
Mom: What’s wrong?
Isaac: Nothing, I was just joking around with her.
No. That is not joking. I am now sitting on Carrie’s bed typing up this blog, and I don’t know how I am supposed to explain this to my mom.
Yesterday I was talking to her about the birth control side effects, and Isaac just turned the TV up louder so I had to scream over him. 🙁 His words keep making me want to cry, but if I let it get to me, then I’m going to keep going down and down, and even further down than I already am.
I just finished straightening my hair five minutes ago.
I accidentally touched it against the left side of my neck for a few seconds. 🙁 That’s gonna hurt later. 😐
I’ll keep you all updated…