My World

Music is inspiring, but it doesn’t necessarily inspire me completely – just sometimes. I like to cut apart dances I watch on TV and in real life and try to do them myself. That’s the world I created. It consists of bits and pieces of dances and words and songs and stories and characteristics of the people I know… Trees surround the area, and then there are cats as well1. It’s quite lovely, and that is where I go for inspiration. I love it there, and I try to visit it each time before I blog, but it’s often quite difficult. I used to go there for testing and such.

In all honesty, I’m afraid of going to sleep. My dreams scare me. I seem to always have nightmares, and I cannot explain why. Taking antihistamines or Melatonin before bed – no matter when that day – only guarantees nightmares and intensifies them, which makes me not want to go to bed anytime soon. It’s quite scary to go to sleep and have a dream that’s really a nightmare that seems so much like reality. I have a fear of going to sleep because of it, even though I love sleeping. Sometimes I fear I won’t wake up from one someday. I mean, that could happen tonight; it could happen tomorrow night – or even next year.

Have you ever fallen asleep in class? I’ve always been so afraid to, but I’ll admit it’s almost happened once or twice before. I’m so afraid of falling asleep in class, because who knows what I will scream out – if I happen to scream anything at all? Who knows what I will say in my sleep or who will point to and stare and laugh at me, creating a crowd because of the crazy, freaked out faces I make whilst I sleep?

I really dislike remembering any of my dreams. I’m often so freaked out at them. That’s why I daydream. daydreaming makes my world go by so much smoother than it would if I didn’t daydream – if I relied only on what I dreamt about physically rather than mentally and what the dreams I dreamt (and still dream) meant, then I would most likely be crazy by now. I’m so glad that I don’t believe in dream meanings and whatnot, because I would be terrified of life itself.

This is why I have my world. It’s mine, and no one can touch it. I let some people in, and I keep a lot of people out. Have you ever tried to talk to me and it not work? I was most likely in my world merely lusting for an escape from my dreams – AKA my nightmares.

Georgina’s post inspired this entry.

It’s also the world I travel to before writing about things not related to blogging, but this doesn’t mean I don’t try to travel to my world before blogging, too.

  1. Like Todd, Savannah, Booger, Rascal, Ranger, Sam, Johnny, Ray and Lucy.

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Comments on this post

Stephanie’s gravatar

I’m honestly sorry that you’re afraid to sleep, because ideally, I think that we should all go to sleep looking forward to rest to get us ready for another day!

Maybe if you changed your sleeping environment just a little bit, like decreased the temperature, you’ll have better dreams?

Liz’s gravatar

Maybe… I tried that last night. …It didn’t work. Blah. I’m going to try getting up earlier in the morning, though? Hopefully that will help! 🙂

Gabi’s gravatar

I’m the exact opposite. I hope for dreams. I’ve had my fair share of scary ones that have left me feeling unpleasant in the morning, but most of mine are…fun, in a way. They’re really strange, but I get most of my inspiration from my dreams. I find it fun to dissect them, because more often than not, I can pinpoint exactly why everything in that dream happened by connecting it to something that happened the day before. I’m not really looking for deep meaning…it’s just little things. Like the other day, my dream took place during Christmas time, and I realized that it probably happened because I finished The Catcher in the Rye that day and the novel took place during Christmas. ‘Tis fascinating.

I’m afraid to fall asleep in class as well, but I know it won’t happen. I have to be in my bed, under my covers to fall asleep. I had to get up for school at 5 AM every day last year, and I was never even close to falling asleep during school no matter how tired I was. It’s just how my body works, I guess. But still, if I fell asleep, I’d be afraid of saying something embarrassing. Apparently I talk and cry and laugh a lot while I sleep.

Liz’s gravatar

I supposedly make strange noises in my sleep, ahah. 😛

I understand what you mean on the little things – I have realized that my dreams usually blow up a small thing from the previous day whether it be a TV show or movie I watched, a song I listened to, something I or someone else said, something I thought, etc. – those kinds of little things. :3

Vicky’s gravatar

I rarely watch music videos, I prefer to just listen to music. It does inspire me a lot, it plays a big part in my life, but I guess everyone is different on how they interpret music.

I’m sorry you have bad dreams, I rarely have bad dreams, in fact I don’t ever remember any of my dreams. Sometimes I feel like I never dream since I’m always in a deep sleep. But you control your dreams; I remember when I used to have bad dreams and I could wake myself up, or make something “good” happen in them. I don’t know why, it’s weird.

There’s some tips here, not sure they’ll be of any help but worth a shot: http://www.wikihow.com/Get-Rid-of-Bad-Dreams

This was a really good entry, btw. 🙂

Liz’s gravatar

Some music videos are fun to watch, but I don’t really like watching them for a second time. 😛 I wish I could control my dreams. D; Thank you for the tips, and I’m glad you found this to be a good entry! <3

Bonnie’s gravatar

Maybe you can see a therapist or doctor about your sleeping conditions. You shouldn’t be afraid to sleep 🙁 I self-diagnosed myself with insomnia for a while because I just couldn’t fall asleep by myself. Thoughts would be running across my mind all the time!

I’ve been close to falling asleep in class. During movies that was played in English class which were EXTREMELY boring, followed by a long day at school and work. Wouldn’t really fall asleep in class, thats disrespect to the teacher but sometimes you can’t really controll that 🙁

I don’t remember my dreams… not usually at least. I remember them for a good 5 minutes and they just vanish! I daydream a lot, not sure if it’s a good thing though!

I think it would very difficult to explain my world, simple but complex. 🙂

Liz’s gravatar

I don’t really have a great experience with therapists, and I don’t feel like it’s serious enough to go and see a doctor about, so I’m pretty sure I’m good for right now! 😛

Yes!!! Movies in class are usually almost always boring, especially if the day itself was pretty long and such. I don’t understand why teachers won’t let their students write/draw during the movie or something , because it’s always way too difficult to pay attention to movies that aren’t exactly “fun”. I think that the falling asleep in class thing scares me more because I find it to be so embarrassing to have to happen to me, and therefore I really hope it never does.

Catherine’s gravatar

Oh god I hate getting nightmares. Even thinking about getting nightmares makes me stomach turn a bit. I’ve had some terrible ones. I once had one that my mum had cancer, and another that my family was held at gun point. Ever since the one about my family being held at gun point I sometimes pray, as I say the rest of my night prayers, that I won’t get nightmares. Especially if I’ve watched a creepy show, lmao.

I’m sorry about your nightmares you’ve been having! I really hope they stop. 🙁

Liz’s gravatar

The nightmares are okay… for now, that is. I napped earlier today for about four hours, which was quite nice. :3

Shellz’s gravatar

Those dreams sound pretty intense! Hmm, perhaps try to stop taking the medicines that cause it for a while and see how that works? I hope they get better though!

I’ve fallen asleep in class alot, but each time I did, luckily no one noticed, or either I was done with my work anyway and the teacher didn’t care. Dx

Liz’s gravatar

I don’t take any medications. o.o…