Things I Hate About Texas

I hate that people think Texas is full of desert, rodeos, country/hick accents, boots, Wrangler jeans-wearing citizens, country music and no guns.

Guns don’t kill people. People with guns who point guns at other people and intentionally pull the trigger kill people.

I hate it when people use “howdy” to greet each other in Texas, or to Texans, like it’s the only way to greet someone. “Howdy” sounds like “how” and a “d”. Unless you want the D from the next guy you see, stop freaking saying it. I think it’s supposed to be short for “how are you doing”, but it’s just so dumb and annoying and HICK-LIKE.

So many people everywhere else hear that I’m from Texas, and their impression of me immediately changes.

I’m embarrassed to be in the “born ‘n raised” group of people; it makes me feel like I’m part of a cattle. You’re not cattle. Unless you plan on selling your soul to the Devil, stop acting like you’re something that can be sold.

People assume Texans use horses for transportation, have merely one religion (Christianity), are full of state pride (do I look full of state pride to YOU?), are illiterate idiots, kill people who don’t think like them and are 100% against same-sex marriage. They also assume Texas is built up of a lot of desolate spaces (that’s a LAUGH) and is full of cowboys.

Honestly? There are so many fake cowboys and cowgirls in this state it’s so easy to find them. They’re the wannabes. And they’re so doing it all wrong.

I hate how people think of us as hill billies.

I hate the Texas flag. Why is it the same colors as those of the USA flag?

I hate that, when I say I’m from Texas, people tell me (even in Texas), “Oh! So you’re a Texan!” like it’s its own nationality or some shit. Personally, I think “American” overrides the “Texan” bit quite a lot. I hate it here.

I hate when I say I hate it here, tell people why, and still get told, “Well, there’s something bad about everywhere. It’s life. You just have to deal with it.” Fuck you.

I hate how everyone always asks, “So, did you see the game last night?” No, I didn’t see the game. Hamilton left. My eye candy is gone. I lost interest anyway when I learned he’s married already, s o …

Isn’t there something else that can be talked about besides SPORTS, anyways?!

I hate how the weather reporters refer to 75 degree Fahrenheit weather as chilly.

I hate how the cowboy wannabes wear bigger belt buckles and talk shit about how all the girls will think they’re big elsewhere. I mean, I get it. You’re big [in the ego department].

The people around here act like we have two seasons. AND THEN THEY BOAST ABOUT IT TO EVERYONE.

I hate Texas. I hate it for many more reasons than this.

I don’t mind it, however, because my family is here.

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Comments on this post

Kristine’s gravatar

The metropolises of Texas tend to be less stereotypical, so that’s why I don’t mind moving to where I am now moving for school. As for my hometown, it is definitely not “country/hicklike,” in fact it gives you sense that you’re actually in a different country. (I’m so close to Mexico.)

I hate how Texas is easily quite known in other countries. I usually state that I’m from the US and when asked what state, people categorize you as Texan over American. (I do not consider myself Texan even if I only lived in that state since I left Philippines.)

Also, some (not all) Texans have big egos, big trucks, and are just obnoxiously hicklike where I live. My boyfriend (non-Texan like me, but has lived in Texas since moving from Wisconsin at 4) and I have a long running joke about these big trucks that Texans drive and just say that the size of the truck is the inverse of their penis size.

Robin’s gravatar

I have some of these same issues with South Carolina as well. I have no interest in sports. I think I would have married my husband after one date just based on the fact that he also didn’t care about football.

Cat’s gravatar

It’s kind of odd because I love Austin, but I don’t like Texas in general. I don’t like the stereotypes of Texas, and the weather is either inconsistent or ridiculously hot. I also don’t like how spread out everything feels. On the bright side, I feel like the cost of living in Texas is a lot lower than other states. I also like the culture in Austin, though I’ve been told that it’s pretty different from other Texas cities. I originally moved here from New York and hated it at first, but I’ve grown to liking it here.

Liz’s gravatar

@Cat, Yeah, I like the culture in Austin, too. It feels more relaxed there it seems like, and everyone’s all about living. It’s nice.

Nancy’s gravatar

Those sound like some stereotypes that the media puts down for Texas… Like Sandy from Spongebob? When I think of Texas, I think of houses being a lot cheaper in prices and you get more out of what you paid for compared to houses over here.

I literally laughed with I read your statement about the D. “Howdy” is the lazy way of saying things. What’s worse? People saying, “sup” or “howdy”? These sound like stereotypes that some other states have. I met people from UTSA and they definitely don’t represent what you said about people from Texas. Sports are pretty big right now; especially with basketball.

Despite of all of these things you hate about Texas, at least you don’t mind about it with your family being there and all :).

Stephanie’s gravatar

I actually know a lot of people from Texas (offline) who do not food the Texas stereotype at all. Sadly, most of them tell me that I should never move to Texas, probably because there are country Hicks who greet each other with a great big “Howdy!”.

But in all honesty, Texas is a populous state with several big cities. In my experience, big cities have a bit of everybody, which means that Texas couldn’t be all country Hicks. People who judge you for being from Texas are silly. (For the record, using Hollywood and the beaches to judge Californians is also very inaccurate a lot of the time.)

Julie’s gravatar

Hi Liza 🙂
I actually thought you were from California for some reason and was very surprised to learn that you are from Texas. Not sure why I thought that exactly… (o_O)
Where would you like to live?

Liv’s gravatar

I would never discriminate just because you live in Texas. Texas is a huge state and when something is that huge, you can no longer generalize. But I think I do have the right to say Blake Shelton is a country hick (he’s from Oklahoma actually). If he wants to be a hick, he has all the freedom he wants and I have the freedom to think he is one. It’s people like him (the ones who live in Texas of course) that give this image to everyone, and they seem darn proud of it.

I am sorry you feel just the way I do, but for me it’s about being Chinese. Because I’m Chinese, everyone discriminates against me because they think I have no manners, am from a farm, talk loudly, etc. This is why I always say my family lives in Beijing rather than China, because I don’t want to be associated with uneducated Chinese people. Probably the same reason Taiwanese people say they’re Taiwanese (China doesn’t recognize Taiwan independence).

I hate how people give people “nationalities” by state. Just because I lived in New Jersey for a year before moving to New York, I got called a fucking Jersey Girl.

And I think 75 is pretty chilly … actually no it’s quite warm in New York because of the humidity. But 75 and dry is pretty chilly.

Jessica’s gravatar

I’m not from Texas, and I haven’t really had any of these stereotypes in my mind. In fact, the “Texans” I have met didn’t sport a fancy “Texan accent” or anything, and I didn’t know they were from there. But there’s stereotypes about everyone and every place, and only people that are ignorant believe them to apply to be 100% true of a population. And it’s good to know that you’re willing to stay for your family, it shows that you care about them a lot 🙂 I am ending up leaving the state, and I feel a bit sad.

Liz’s gravatar

@Jessica, I don’t really stay for my family; I just hate it a little less because my family is in it.

James’s gravatar

I feel your pain. Good rant, by the way. First of all, let me say that I am completely impressed by what you had to say.I have never heard a Texan say even one negative thing about his state. Thank you. Now, on with my rant. I hate Texas with a purple passion that glows in the dark. I moved here from California eight years ago because of a job transfer. I am not joking when I say that I can’t come up with one good thing to say about this place.

Texas pride is completely out of control. I just don’t see what all the fuss is about. Texas is part of the U.S. just like any of the other state, but most Texans don’t see it that way. The in your face bravado that is constantly thrown around is sickening. The state’s shape is plastered on everything. You don’t see people walking around with the shape of Kansas tattooed on them! And must the star be attached to so many things? WHY?!?

Texas branding: The next time you’re in the super market, notice how many products either start with Texas or is Texas style. They hi-jack a lot of stuff. Tex Mex? Come on!

Add to this the bad drivers, the crappy climate, fire ants and brown lakes with rotton stumps sticking up out of the mosquito infested water, and what have you got? A dig dried up dirt clod. Thanks for letting me vent.

Liz’s gravatar

@James, There are some good things about this state; it really depends on where you live and who you interact with.